Chaos and counselling
I'm not going to tell you chaos in your life is a good thing. Or maybe I am. My post splits here, it goes in slightly different directions and ends up in very different places.
You see there is chaos and there is chaos.
One chaos is the common definition. We equate it with disorder and distress, a lack of focus, unpredictability, confusion, turmoil, and disruption. This is a place where we sometimes say people are "stuck".
The second use of chaos is within the mathematics of complex dynamic systems - including your brain with its 10 billion self organizing neurons. Within this understanding seemingly wild and unpredictable patterns are actually controlled by basic parameters around which the pattern is organized. You may recognize that many lives we think of as chaotic actually have recurring themes, actions, and outcomes. There is a pattern. Some would say that is the problem.
Chaos in a dynamic system is just one possible state. One characteristic of this chaotic state is "sensitive dependence on initial conditions". From that state a slight intervention can cause a big change in outcome. This idea is behind the notion that the flap of a butterfly's wings in the South Pacific can cause a storm in Tofino.
Counsellors and therapists know those moments when a question or challenge registers with a person, it goes home, is taken to heart, stops someone in their tracks, and important change begins. That is the chaos you want in your life.
This is a very abstract way of describing therapeutic intervention and effect. Catching the moments when intervention is leveraged in this way is intuitive. That intuition rests in the belly, the temples, the neck and shoulders, even the muscles of the jaw. Mine and yours. It is supported in experience. It is what happens when we are accepted as we are, and our protective patterns relax. That is the chaos from which new order emerges.
This is a different outcome than repeating a stuck pattern.
You see there is chaos and there is chaos.
One chaos is the common definition. We equate it with disorder and distress, a lack of focus, unpredictability, confusion, turmoil, and disruption. This is a place where we sometimes say people are "stuck".
The second use of chaos is within the mathematics of complex dynamic systems - including your brain with its 10 billion self organizing neurons. Within this understanding seemingly wild and unpredictable patterns are actually controlled by basic parameters around which the pattern is organized. You may recognize that many lives we think of as chaotic actually have recurring themes, actions, and outcomes. There is a pattern. Some would say that is the problem.
Chaos in a dynamic system is just one possible state. One characteristic of this chaotic state is "sensitive dependence on initial conditions". From that state a slight intervention can cause a big change in outcome. This idea is behind the notion that the flap of a butterfly's wings in the South Pacific can cause a storm in Tofino.
Counsellors and therapists know those moments when a question or challenge registers with a person, it goes home, is taken to heart, stops someone in their tracks, and important change begins. That is the chaos you want in your life.
This is a very abstract way of describing therapeutic intervention and effect. Catching the moments when intervention is leveraged in this way is intuitive. That intuition rests in the belly, the temples, the neck and shoulders, even the muscles of the jaw. Mine and yours. It is supported in experience. It is what happens when we are accepted as we are, and our protective patterns relax. That is the chaos from which new order emerges.
This is a different outcome than repeating a stuck pattern.